Reality Check: Boredom. Check.

I have come to the conclusion that I am exceptionally bored with my reality. Long ago, I would say that "When I'm bored, I break things." Case in point, my social and romantic life.

I feel like there are many factors associated with this boredom, primarily because of the cold weather and the women I would choose to surround myself with are either A) across the country, B) over half an hour away, C) working until late at night, or D) homebodies busy with their own lives.

So what am I doing to circumvent these challenges?

A) I talk to my friends around the country on a fairly regular basis. Via text, via Facebook... etc.
B) I teach in the town where some of my friends live. I have begun to spend real time with them, and I am currently staying with one of these wonderful women for a week to help her clean her home to get ready for a baby shower this weekend. (Procrastination at its best; grammar, not so much.) I also plan to go to Indianapolis to visit another friend at the end of the month.
C) I have begun to go on walks and go to the gym with my friends in-town who work until late at night. I actually have plans next week to do Zumba with one of my teacher friends, and my baker friend. It will be phenomenal.
D) Oh wait, that's me... Refer to points A-C.

I spend so much time trying to work within the system I have created for myself that I am imploding. Or exploding, depending on who is around and what is going on.

I seek attention when I should be entertaining myself. I understand this is not a positive thing, and the entertainment measures have already been identified. My goal for this year was to do at least two things per week for myself, and I have been sorely lacking. Now's the time for me to actually DO this.

And by this, I mean fix my life. But right this second, I'm going to publish this so I don't forget. :)

Throwbacks: Call me a realist, but the stars are dead to me.

I wondered a little wonder this afternoon: Does wishing on a star count if we know the star we are wishing on is just an image of a star that died a long time ago?

Are wishes really valid then?

Can lingering images grant the thoughtful longings of romantics, or are we better off wishing into the blackness — the space between the stars — so that maybe, one day, when the light of those stars reaches Earth our wish will come true for someone else?

Would that have worked for peace in the Middle East? If I ever see Jesus, maybe I’ll ask.

They glint, and they flicker like laughter — they must be laughing at the absurdity of human emotion, of life’s tribulations.

We are so frail compared to them, aren’t we? Our lives are measured in years; theirs, in eons. The stars are millions of light years away, and ancient. But they’re already dead by the time we see them — maybe that’s our strength:

Compared to the dead, glittering stars, Humanity seems strong.

At least we can see the living while they live, and the dead when they die. Stars don’t get a choice. Why DO we find such faith and beauty within the dead?

Are shooting stars really shooting at all, or have they just been shot? It seems like they fall more to me —

in a clean, quick arc across the sky.

Falling. Dead.

***

Was going through Facebook notes and found this... it still holds true. So I wanted to share it. Again.